Laurel and Hardy marathon on Turner Classic Movies

You are here: Blog >Laurel and Hardy marathon on Turner Classic Movies

An all-day marathon of Laurel and Hardy on Turner Classic Movies, on August 23rd, starting at 6:30 am (Central time zone).  Shown in chronological order, it’s a wonderful presentation of some of Laurel and Hardy’s best short films as well as full length films.  In order, they are:

• Night Owls (1930)
• Blotto (1930)
• Brats (1930)
• Hog Wild (1930)
• Be Big (1931)
• Laughing Gravy (1931)
• Our Wives (1931)
• Pardon Us (1931)
• One Good Turn (1931)
• Beau-Hunks (1931)
• Helpmates (1932)
• Bonnie Scotland (1935)
• The Fixer Uppers (1935)
• Them Thar Hills (1934)
• Tit for Tat (1935)
• The Live Ghost (1934)
• The Devil’s Brother (1933)
• Me and My Pal (1933)
• Their First Mistake (1932)
• Pack Up Your Troubles (1932)
• Scram! (1932)
• County Hospital (1932)
• The Chimp (1932)
• The Music Box (1932)
• Sons of the Desert (1933)
• Way Out West (1938)
• Swiss Miss (1938)
• Block-Heads (1938)
• The Flying Deuces (1939)
• A Chump at Oxford
• Saps at Sea (1940)
• Air Raid Wardens (1943)

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You are here: Clowning Tutorial >Warm ups and cool downs at clown performances

One of the basics about clown performances that often bet overlooked is the need for warm up exercises beforehand, and cool down exercises afterward.  Athletes know about the need for both warm up and cool down exercises - and we don’t typically think of ourselves as athletes, but a clown performance can be just as physically demanding.  When clowning, we tend to use muscles that we forgot that we had—and those muscles tend to remind us of that fact afterwards.  In addition, there tends to be a lot of bending, stooping down to the children’s height, etc.—and if our muscles aren’t ready for that, they’ll hurt afterward.

In order to prevent that, we need to do warm up exercises before we clown, and the same muscle-loosening exercises after, in order to cool down.  Basics include standing upright, feet apart, and stretching your arms above your head, bringing them down to shoulder height (making a ‘T’ shape), rolling your neck around, bending at the hips and again rotating your torso around in a circle, bending at the knees, etc.  If you’ve somehow managed to get past Physical Education in high school without learning how to do warm up exercises, you can read all about it at How Stuff Works.

Something that we tend to forget is the need to again loosen those same muscles after a performance - the cool down exercises.  Fail to do that, and your muscles will lock up just like mine did yesterday.  As Ben Franklin is purported to have said, you have to learn from the mistakes of others, since you won’t live long enough to make them all yourself.

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You are here: Lucille Ball > I Love Lucy > I Love Lucy season 3 >Ricky Watches the Baby - I Love Lucy

Ricky Watches the Baby - I Love Lucy season 3, episode 80, originally aired January 18, 1954

Ricky Watches the Baby is a very funny, and very good episode of I Love Lucy.  With Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz) having the week off from work, Lucy (Lucille Ball) drops several ‘subtle’ hints that he should spend some time with his son, Little Ricky.  Ricky surprises her by agreeing, and when it’s time for Little Ricky to be put to bed, Ricky tucks him in and tells an absolutely hilarious bilingual version of Little Red Riding Hood—the highlight of the episode.  Due to Lucy’s skill as a very skilled clown, people tend to underestimate Desi Arnaz’ comedy skills—but as he proves here, he’s a very gifted comedian and clown in his own right.

The next morning, Lucy is supposed to be able to sleep in, but a wonderful game of ‘gotcha’ occurs, as she goes to check on Little Ricky, only to hear Ricky taking care of him—so she goes back to bed.  But then she thinks about what she just heard, dashes back into the kitchen, only to realize that she only heard part of what Ricky was saying.  Later, however, when overprotective momma Lucy is supposed to go shopping with Ethel (Vivian Vance), she’s reluctant to cut the apron strings and comes back to the apartment, to find Little Ricky wandering in the hall, all alone (having ‘escaped’ when his godfather Fred (William Frawley) came to visit with Ricky and watch the fights on TV).  Lucy and Ethel decide to teach the boys a lesson, with Lucy and Ethel taking Little Ricky to the Mertzes’ apartment, where Lucy calls and asks to talk to Little Ricky—which is when Ricky and Fred realize that the little boy is missing!

Lucy comes in because she wants to kiss Little Ricky goodbye before she ‘leaves’ - as Ricky tries to stall while Fred looks for the missing Little Ricky.  Fred finds him upstairs in his apartment, and sneaks him out while Ethel’s back is turned, and while Ricky and Lucy are engaged in talking Fred sneaks Little Ricky into his crib.  When Lucy finally storms into the nursery, her “Aha!” turns into a “Huh?” and Ricky is puzzled as well (although he doesn’t confess anything to Lucy), and Ethel bursts in (having noticed that Little Ricky is ‘missing’) shouting “Lucy, I can’t find him!” Find who? Ethel, seeing Little Ricky in the crib tries to cover by saying that she can’t find her husband Fred—who’s been hiding behind the door ever since putting the little boy back in his crib, and now pops out with “Here I am!”

It’s a very funny episode, with a nice reversal at the end - Ricky Watches the Baby is available on the I Love Lucy season 3 DVD collection.

Funny quotes from Ricky Watches the Baby - I Love Lucy

[after Fred hears for the first time that Ricky has a week off from the club]
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Ethel, why didn’t you tell me Ricky had a week off?
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): [surprised] What? Lucy, why didn’t you tell me Ricky had a week off?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): [to Ricky] Why didn’t you tell me Ricky had a week off?

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Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): There’s a gentleman who lives in the neighborhood who’s just dying to meet you. He’s heard a lot about you and I think it’s high time you two got together.
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Who’s that?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): His name is Ricky Ricardo Junior.
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): You mean little Ricky?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Oh, then you have heard of him?

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[Ricky announces that he’ll take care of Little Ricky during his week off]
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): You mean everything?
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Yeah. All day--everything.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): That means getting up at 6:00.
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): So? That’s not so tough.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): I don’t know if you know this working nights and all, but there’s a 6:00 in the morning, too.

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Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Did you know we were there the whole time?
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Not the whole time; at first, I thought it was mice, but I never heard mice giggle before.

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You are here: Reviews > Red Skelton reviews >The Great Diamond Robbery | Red Skelton | Cara Williams

The Great Diamond Robbery (1953) starring Red Skelton, Cara Williams

In The Great Diamond Robbery, Red Skelton plays Ambrose C. Park, a jewel cutter who was abandoned on a park bench as an infant (hence his name—Ambrose Central Park).  He is looking for his family, thinking that finding them will fill the void in his life.  He eats his lunch in Central Park every day across from the bench where he was left as an infant, in hopes that his parents will come by—to no avail.  In his work life he is a jewel cutter, working for a rich man who has sunk his entire fortune of $2 million dollars (in 1953, a large fortune) into the purchase of a single gem - the ‘blue goddess’ (similar to the Hope diamond) - which is too expensive to sell, so he plans to have a great jewel cutter cut it in two, so that each half is more easily sold—but despite Ambrose having worked for him for twenty years, he doesn’t trust Ambrose to do the job.

Ambrose celebrates his ‘birthday’ at a diner where where brings along a birthday cake—since he has no friends to celebrate with.  The man behind the counter surprises him, however, with a foreign bottle of wine made from prunes - ‘prune juice’ - and he’s soon a stewed prune, who becomes arrested for being drunk and disorderly.  This leads to his being represented by a shyster lawyer named Mr. Remlick (played by a young James Whitmore), who begins to try and fleece poor Ambrose out of his life savings—in exchange for finding his ‘real’ family.

This leads to a an acquaintance of Remlick’s, Mr. Fargoh, who agrees to play the part of Ambrose’s father, and who coerces his girlfriend and her daughter to play the part of Ambrose’s mother (played very well by Dorothy Stickney) and his sister Maggie (played by Cara Williams).  This is where the plan begins to unravel, however, as “Mom” begins to legitimately care for her “son” Ambrose ("I leave him on a park bench, and he gives me earrings ...").  Also, unknown to the dishonest lawyer, Mr. Fargoh has brought in a much more successful, and more dangerous, criminal into the false family - “Uncle” Tony Medeli, who intends to use Ambrose to steal the diamond.

Along the way, Ambrose tries to rescue his “sister” from her job of dancing at a night club, and asks the family where they go to church?  Leading to a funny scene where the “fish out of water” family goes to church to maintain the appearance of a normal happy family, as well as to a conversation between Ambrose and Maggie, where they each reveal a little bit about themselves to each other—paving the way for the ending romantic conclusion.  After the attempt at having the strait-laced Ambrose steal the diamond fail, “Uncle Tony” and the rest of the family convince him to let them come along for the cutting of the diamond—after tying up “mother” and Maggie, who refuse to go along with hurting “their boy” Ambrose.  The ending is actually both comedic and dramatic, with a finale that’s cute and funny as well—ending up in the hospital delivery room, and “happily ever after.”

A funny movie, that oddly doesn’t have room for any of the unique things that we normally associate with Red Skelton.  Sadly, it’s not currently available on DVD—I was fortunate to see it on Turner Classic Movies.

Trivia about The Great Diamond Robbery starring Red Skelton, Cara Williams, James Whitmore

• This was Skelton’s last film for MGM. He had been under contract with the studio since 1940.

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You are here: News >Professional Clown foils burglary

(Sacramento, CA) A professional clown in full costume foiled two burglars when he pulled his fake pistol during an attempted robbery.

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You are here: News > Red Skelton >Come celebrate Red Skelton’s Birthday on July 18th at Clown Jam!

A note that I saw on groups.yahoo.com in the Caring_clowns group, and wanted to pass on:

Hello!
We have a great convention planned in beautiful Branson, Mo July 16-20. Scheduled are great classes, fun competitions, training for the kids and a great dinner and show for Saturday. Recently added is a fun “Hobo” dinner in honor of Red Skelton on Friday with a special guest speaker. The website is www.ClownJam.com and don’t forget the American Clown Idol contest, see you there!

Tom King & Steve Kissell

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You are here: Reviews > Red Skelton reviews >Ship Ahoy | Red Skelton | Eleanor Powell

Ship Ahoy is the title of a 1942 musical-comedy motion picture produced by MGM. The film stars Eleanor Powell as Tallulah Winters, a dancing star who is hired to perform on an ocean liner. Before she leaves, she is recruited by what she believes is a branch of the American government and asked to smuggle a prototype explosive mine out of the country. In fact, she is unknowingly working for Nazi agents who have stolen the mine. Meanwhile, Merton Kibble (Red Skelton), a writer of pulp fiction adventure stories but suffering from severe writer’s block, is on the same ship and soon he finds himself embroiled in Tallulah’s real-life adventure. Also appearing in the film were Bert Lahr, Tommy Dorsey, Buddy Rich, and Virginia O’Brien This was the first of two films in which Powell and Skelton co-starred. Red Skelton and Eleanor Powell next paired up in 1943’s I Dood It. In that film, they appeared with Jimmy Dorsey, Tommy’s brother.

Courtesy of YouTube, you can see Red Skelton, Eleanor Powell and Bert Lahr in the musical number I’ll Take Tallulah.

Editorial review of Ship Ahoy starring Red Skelton and Eleanor Powell—courtesy of Amazon.com

Miss Winters is a dancer with the Tommy Dorsey Orchestra and is asked to secretly transport a prototype magnetic mine to Puerto Rico. She thinks that she is working for the US Government, but fails to see why she would be involved. The enemy agents got the plan from a pulp novel written by Kibble, who is also on the ship and falls for her. But then she overhears his new novel and believes that he is talking about her. So when they leave the boat, she ignores him, but somehow, the bags get switched and he gets the magnetic mine--which she must later retrieve. It is mainly a Tommy Dorsey showcase with Sinatra singing--Powell dancing--and a small plot.

Trivia for Ship Ahoy starring Red Skelton, Eleanor Powell, Bert Lahr

• The title was changed from I’ll Take Manila to Ship Ahoy because the Philippines had already fallen to the Japanese in the war. The ship destination was changed from Manila to Puerto Rico, and the song “I’ll Take Manila” was changed to “I’ll Take Tallulah”.
• One song I Fell In Love (With the Leader of the Band), by Jule Styne and Herb Magidson, was filmed but not used. The footage was used in The Great Morgan (1946).
• Frank Sinatra makes his film debut as a singer with the Tommy Dorsey Orchestra. Also look quickly for Broadway star John Raitt as a young sailor.

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You are here: Reviews > Abbott and Costello reviews >Abbott and Costello classic comedy baseball jersey - WHO - 1

A picture is worth a thousand words - 100% cotton preshrunk T-shirt that looks like the baseball jersey from Abbott and Costello’s classic Who’s on First? routine - with the player’s name (WHO) and number (1) on the back of the jersey.

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You are here: Three Stooges > Three Stooges short films >Horses Collars - the Three Stooges

Horses Collars (1935) starring The Three Stooges - Moe Howard, Larry Fine, Curly Howard

Moe, Larry, the cheese!  In this Three Stooges short film, Curly goes wild whenever he sees a mouse, and the only thing that calms him down is Moe or Larry feeding him cheese.  Set in the American Old West, the Three Stooges are inept detectives, hired by a young lady to retrieve an IOU from the movie’s villain, Double Deal Decker (do you get the idea that he cheats at cards)?

When the Three Stooges try to steal Decker’s wallet (where they think the IOU is hidden), they are soon caught, and are being hung for their crime, where Curly sees a mouse, leading to a scene where Curly is wildly attacking everyone in sight, crying out “Moe! Larry! the cheese!” while Moe and Larry and dangling from their nooses—thankfully, they get down in time to prevent being hung, and even feed Curly his cheese.

Later on, the Three Stooges try to break into Decker’s safe, again leading to a very funny fight scene with Decker and Curly sharing a coat while Curly beats up all of Decker’s men, Decker, and Moe and Larry as well!  All ends well, as Moe and Larry feed Curly some Limburger cheese - and Curly’s foul breath knocks them all out.

Highlights of the film include the ‘tin roof’ joke when the Three Stooges order a drink at Decker’s bar, shooting a coin in the air and receiving change, and the ‘accordion’ music playing when they’re caught with Decker’s wallet.  A very funny western Three Stooges short film, which I hope you enjoy as much as I did.

Horses Collars is available on The Three Stooges Collection Volume 1 DVD.

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You are here: Bozo >Larry Harmon biography

Biography of Larry Harmon (January 2, 1925 – July 3, 2008) better known as Bozo the Clown

Born as Lawrence Weiss, he was better known to the world as Larry Harmon, the man who purchased the licensing rights to Bozo the Clown from Capitol Records, and turned Bozo into an international sensation.

Larry Harmon was born in Toledo, Ohio, on Jan. 2, 1925 as Lawrence Weiss, and was raised in Cleveland. After Larry Harmon served in the Army during World War II, he moved to Los Angeles where he attended the University of Southern California, where he majored in theater and was drum major in the Trojan marching band.  While Larry Harmon was attending USC, he started acting in radio and movies and, in the early 1950s, he starred in the Commander Comet TV series.  He later auditioned for the role of Bozo the Clown, and was one of many hired for various promotions for Capitol Records.

Together with a group of investors, Larry Harmon bought the licensing rights to the Bozo character from Bozo’s creator Alan W. Livingston and Capitol Records. Larry Harmon marketed the Bozo property very aggressively, and by the late 1960s, Harmon had licensed local Bozo TV shows in nearly every major U.S. market, and across the world in places as far away as Thailand, Greece and Brazil.  In addition Larry Harmon marketed virtually everything imaginable related to Bozo the Clown, from lunch boxes to bedsheets to the classic Bozo Bop Bag.  He also created the company that produced the Bozo the Clown cartoons shown on the various Bozo the Clown shows, and supplied the voice for Bozo as well.  He also produced other cartoons, such as Popeye and the Laurel and Hardy cartoons.  Years later, he was executive producer on The All New Adventures of Laurel and Hardy in ‘For Love or Mummy’.

On New Years day 1996, Larry Harmon dressed as Bozo for the first time in 10 years, appearing in the Rose Parade in Pasadena CA, to a deafening reaction from a thrilled crowd.

In 2004, Larry Harmon and Bozo the Clown were in the news when the International Clown Hall of Fame in Milwaukee announced it was revoking its’ Lifetime of Laughter Award given to Larry Harmon in 1990 for being Bozo’s creator, and posthumously inducted Pinto Colvig as the original Bozo the Clown.

Kathryn O’Dell, the International Clown Hall of Fame’s executive director, stated that they had been duped into believing that Larry Harmon created Bozo the Clown, and did not discover the truth until Buck Wolf, an ABCNews.com columnist, reported that Larry Harmon was wrongly laying claim to having created the character.

On July 3, 2008 Larry Harmon died in his home of congestive heart failure at the age of 83 in Los Angeles, California.  Larry Harmon is survived by his wife Susan, his son, Jeff, his daughters, Lori Harmon, Marci Breth Carabet, Ellen Kosberg and Leslie Breth; and four grandchildren.

Larry Harmon quotes

• Bozo is a combination of the wonderful wisdom of the adult and the childlike ways in all of us.  Bozo is a star, an entertainer, bigger than life. People see him as Mr. Bozo, somebody you can relate to, touch and laugh with.
• We didn’t have satellite, syndication and networking like today.  So, I created my own network of local clowns and productions, a cross-country operation that kept me on the road for 50 weeks a year for decades.
• Isn’t it a shame the credit that was given to me for the work I have done—they arbitrarily take it down, like I didn’t do anything for the last 52 years. (referring to having his induction into the Clown Hall of Fame rescinded)
• What I created for the world was me and my image: what I sound like, what I look like, what I walk like, what the costume looked like.

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You are here: Reviews > Red Skelton reviews >Red Skelton - America’s Favorite Funnyman

Red Skelton - America’s Favorite Funnyman is a DVD collection of 10 episodes of The Red Skelton Show.  Not a bad collection by any means, and inexpensive as well ($9.95 U.S. dollars at the time of this writing), and it has a collection of some of my favorite episodes as well.  They are:

Clem the Dentist

Clem the Painter

A favorite Clem Kadiddlehopper episode—where Clem, the ‘country bumpkin’ takes the art world by storm—a very funny episode where Red ‘artfully’ mocks the modern art movement.

Deadeye and the Indians

A very funny episode that, interestingly enough, runs out of time—and Red plays that for all it’s worth.  Very rapid-fire, and very funny - “a hot stake is better than a cold chop!”

Look Awards Show

A very unusual show, where Red presents the Look Awards to various individuals, and performs some short related sketches

Freddie and the Spies

A very funny Freddie the Freeloader episode, where an American agent (played by Richard Deacon of The Dick Van Dyke Show) gives Freddie ‘the little black box’ to hide—and Edward Everett Horton makes an appearance as a fellow hobo who tries to find out why Freddie acts so suspiciously (hilariously funny!) and Freddie eventually gets contacted by the spies, who try to pry the information out of him—also hilariously funny!  One of my all-time favorite episodes.

Halloween Show

How to Make a Salad

A fairly funny Willie Lump Lump episode, with Willie in the Army on KP duty.

Mr. Lasagna

Red Skelton (playing a variation on himself, as opposed to one of his many characters) plays with his son Richie’s chemistry set, and inadvertently discovers a cure for smog.  A gangster, Mr. Lasagna (George Raft) wants the information, and is willing to get rough in order to get it ...

Bolivar Goes Hollywood

The U.N. Show

A very special show, where Red Skelton does a ‘command performance’ of pantomime at the United Nations.

Product Description of Red Skelton - America’s Favorite Funnyman

A clown with a heart of gold, Red Skelton‘s mission in life was to make people laugh. A first-class comedian, Skelton won the world over with his legendary alter-egos including Junior the Mean Widdle Kid (famous for the expression, “I dood it"); country bumpkin Clem Kadiddlehopper; clown hobo Freddie the Freeloader; con man San Fernando Red; henpecked husband George Appleby; drunkard Willie Lump Lump; boxer Cauliflower McPugg; and the not-so-honest lawman, Sheriff Deadeye. These characters and more made appearances on his popular television series The Red Skelton Show—the second longest running TV show in history at twenty years of broadcasting. For the duration of this time, Skelton’s series maintained top ten and top twenty ratings and won several awards. Packed with celebrity guests, pratfalls, pranks, and silly sketches, The Red Skelton Show continues to delight audiences time and time again, proving that Red Skelton is indeed “America’s favorite funnyman.”

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You are here: Reviews > Red Skelton reviews >Red Skelton Unreleased

Red Skelton Unreleased is a fairly different DVD collection of The Red Skelton Show in several respects.  It is digitally remastered, unlike most of the Red Skelton DVD collections out there.  It is also authorized by the Red Skelton estate.  It also contains a lot of episodes of The Red Skelton Show - sixteen episodes in all, as well three full-length color episodes from Red’s final year on broadcast TV, as well as a taping of one of Red’s live shows.

Table of contents for Red Skelton Unreleased

Volume 1 of Red Skelton Unreleased

Cauliflower Loses His Birds:

Guest Starring: Vincent Price

Appleby’s Bearded Boarder:

Guest Starring: John Carradine and Marie Windsor

Clem’s General Store:

Guest Starring: Jayne Mansfield, Jamie Farr and Jesse White

Deadeye the Outlaw:

Guest Starring: Mickey Rooney

Volume II of Red Skelton Unreleased

Best Man Blues:

Guest Starring: Dick Foran and Maria Palmer

Appleby’s Office Party:

Guest Starring: Marilyn Maxwell & Harvey Korman

San Fernando Cal:

Guest Starring: Mary Beth Hughes

Clem and the Beanstalk:

Guest starring Mamie Van Doren and Peter Lorre

Volume III of Red Skelton Unreleased

The Many Skeltons in Las Vegas:

Featuring: George Appleby, Freddie the Freeloader, Clem Kadiddlehopper and Willie Lump Lump

Clem’s Other Clem:

Guest Starring: Hans Conried

Go Van Gogh:

Guest Starring: Pat Carroll

Clem and the Beauty Pageant:

Guest Starring: Arthur Godfrey and Keefe Brasselle

Volume IV

San Fernando Loses the Dixie Queen:

Guest Starring: Cesar Romero

Appleby the Weatherman:

Guest Starring: Peter Lorre

Bolivar and the Roaring ‘20s:

Guest Starring: Barbara Nichols and Gerald Mohr

Deadeye the Magician:

Guest Starring: Vincent Price and Marie Windsor

Free Bonus DVD’S

Bonus 1 - Full length color shows!

Good Night and Good Bless –3 Shows

• Episode #1 Guest Starring: Jill St. John
• Episode #2 Guest Starring: Phyllis Diller
• Episode #3 Guest Starring: Jerry Lewis

Bonus 2 - Rare Live Footage!

• Live at the Nugget Hotel in Sparks – and Pledge of Allegiance

Product description of Red Skelton Unreleased

Enjoy sixteen full episodes and two bonus discs packed with hours of outrageous entertainment and gut busting humor from Red Skeleton, America’s favorite clown Prince. Released for the first time since they aired live nearly forty years ago, episodes I-IV showcase endearing moments with some of Hollywood’s greatest legends including Mickey Rooney, Jayne Mansfield, Cesar Romero, and more.

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You are here: Three Stooges > Three Stooges short films >Wee Wee Monsieur - the Three Stooges

Wee Wee Monsier (1938) starring The Three Stooges (Moe Howard, Larry Fine, Curly Howard)

In Wee Wee Monsieur, the Three Stooges (Moe Howard, Larry Fine and Curly Howard) are three would-be artists, living in France, and working on their respective arts, and the short film begins with them singing The Lollipop Song ("the lollipop, the lollipop, the la-la-la-lollipop—woo woo!").  After some short slapstick, the Three Stooges try to ‘catch’ some food by ‘fishing’ out of their second story window, and catching bread from a vendor’s cart on the street—and accidentally ‘catching’ a French police officer’s pants as well!  Being thrown out of their apartment for being 8 months behind on their rent, the Stooges espy the offices of the French Foreign Legion—and while thinking that this must be the French branch of the American Legion (and that they can send them home to America), the Three Stooges inadvertently sign up for the French Foreign Legion—which leads to the second part of the film.

Vernon Dent, as their sergeant, makes the mistake of assigning the Three Stooges to guard the captain—who is promptly kidnapped while the Stooges fight over how to march.  What to do?  The only sensible thing—disguise themselves as Santa Claus and rescue the captain! Well, sensible for the Stooges, at least.  Despite the silliness, or more likely because of it, the Stooges rescue the captain from his captives and escape on Santa’s sleight.

Wee Wee Monsieur is available as part of The Three Stooges Collection volume 2 DVD.

Funny movie quotes from Wee Wee Monsieur starring The Three Stooges—Moe, Larry, Curly

Moe Howard: The landlord’s threatened to throw us out.
Curly Howard: What’s he squawking about, we only owe for eight months.

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Curly Howard: Ah my fair beauty, open up thy curtains so that I might see your fair kisser.
Moe Howard: Oh boy! I’ll take the blonde!
Larry Fine: I’ll take the brunette!
Curly Howard: I’ll take the black and tan!

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[after Moe conks Curly in the head with a chisel, and then apologizes]
Curly Howard: Oh, oui, oui, oui, oui.
Moe Howard: Oui what?
Curly Howard: “Oui” ("We") should be more careful about what we do around here… Chisler!
[Moe conks him again]

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Curly Howard: [Moe has taken off Curly’s hat after his beard fell off and then slaps him] Oh you hit Santa Claus just for that no toys.
Curly Howard: [Moe bops Curlys head] Ow ooohhhh!

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You are here: Three Stooges > Three Stooges short films >Back to the Woods - the Three Stooges

Back to the Woods (1937) - starring the Three Stooges - Moe Howard, Larry Fine, Curly Howard

Set in colonial times, the Three Stooges (Moe Howard, Larry Fine and Curly Howard) are sentenced to defend the English colonies (instead of 50 years hard labor) and quickly fall for the Governor’s three pretty daughters (Faith, Hope and Charity) after a funny dancing scene with the daughters - and go hunting for turkeys against the orders of Chief Rain in the Puss, leader of the local tribe of American Indians - who will not allow the Pilgrims to go hunting until they pay 5,000 shekels.  The Three Stooges exchange their pilgrim hats for coonskin caps—except for Curly, who puts on a skunk cap.  Curly accidentally discharges his gun, shooting a large turkey (which lands on Larry, knocking him down).  They fire upon a group of ‘turkeys’—which turn out to be Indians wearing headdresses, leading to the second half of the short film, where the Indians chase the Three Stooges, and the Stooges try to stay alive.  There’s a very funny segment where Moe and Curly ‘lose’ Larry, and have to rescue him from being burnt at the stake—and from a woodpecker as well!  This leads to one of the Stooges best slapstick fights, and the Three Stooges escaping via boat—in motorboat style.

Back to the Woods is available as part of The Three Stooges Collection volume 2 (DVD).

Funny movie quotes from Back to the Woods starring the Three Stooges

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Larry: [an imaginary horse race] They’re off! Who’s in the quarter?
Curly: Whopper!
Larry: Who’s in the half?
Curly: Whopper!
Larry: Who’s in the stretch?
Curly: Whopper!
Larry: Who’s the winner?
Curly: Rosemont!
Moe: Who’s the winner?
Curly: Rosemont.
[Moe slaps him]

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Judge: [shouting above the confused noise] Order! Order!
Curly: Order? I’ll take a ham sandwich!
Judge: Hold thy tongue!
Curly: Not tongue, ham!

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Larry: [as Curly heads for Faith, who is more attractive than her sister Charity] What doest thou? I saw her first!
Curly: Pish-posh and tish-tosh! I’ll never give her up. Why does not thou take Charity?
Larry: I need not charity. I’m on the WPA.
Curly: WPA?
Larry: Aye! Willing Pilgrims Association.

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Chief Rain in the Puss: Ugh! No more war. Give 5000 shekels.
Governor: But we have no more than this.
[He shakes a small pouchful of coins]
Chief Rain in the Puss: Mmmm! Good down payment. Take mortgage on balance - interest six per cent.
Pilgrim: Thank goodness! At last are we free to hunt?
Chief Rain in the Puss: No! No hunt till FOB!
Governor: FOB?
Chief Rain in the Puss: Fork over balance!
Curly: Indian givers!

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Moe: Fire at will!
Curly: Which one is Will?

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You are here: Skits >Meet the Chez Family - free clown skit

Meet the Chez Family - a clown skit for two speaking clowns

(props required: a black envelope, easily made out of construction paper, and a large letter ‘E’ cut out of construction paper and placed inside the envelope)

(Clown 1 enters, walks to the middle of the stage, possibly sits in a chair, and pulls out the black envelope, concentrating on it. Clown 2 enters, looking high & low, frantically, for Clown 1)

Clown 2: (to Clown 1) There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you! We’ve got to get ready to do our skit about being nice to others!

Clown 1: (just beginning to notice Clown 2, looks up at him) Hmm? Oh.. Oh! I’m sorry! I forgot all about it… I just received this from the mailman, and I’m kind of worried…

Clown 2: (puzzled) Worried? About the letter?

Clown 1: (holds up black envelope for the audience) I think it might be ‘blackmail’

Clown 2: (groans, or otherwise reacts appropriately to the atrocious pun) Oh! Just open it, already!

Clown 1: OK! (opens the envelope, pulls out the red letter ‘E’)—Wow! I was worried about nothing! It’s E-mail!

Clown 2: (reacts again)

Clown 1: And now I’m ‘red E’ (holds up red letter ‘E’ as he does this) to read it!

Clown 2: (as though fearful of more puns) Who’s it from? And does it have anything to do with out skit about being nice to people?

Clown 1: (looks up from reading the letter) Sort of—it’s from my friend Pete from Atlanta, Georgia. Some people make fun of his name, and aren’t nice at all!

Clown 2: What’s to make fun of with a name like ‘Pete’?

Clown 1: His last name is pronounced ‘Chez’ (no, not ‘shay’—phonetically, ‘Chez’) Pete Chez.

Clown 2: (unable to repress a giggle) His name is Pete Chez? Like the fruit, Peaches? (laughs, but only a little bit)

Clown 1: That’s not being nice! He can’t help that his name is Pete Chez!

Clown 2: (still giggling slightly) And he’s from Atlanta? Does that make him one of the Georgia Peaches? (more snickering)

Clown 1: (now getting indignant) And you’re going to do a skit about being nice to people, and not picking on them? Remember what the Bible says: "Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you." (Ephesians 4:31-32)

Clown 2: (still giggling, trying to get control of himself) Sorry… really I am. Does your friend have anything to say?

Clown 1: Yes, actually. Apparently he and his brother Matt have been fighting, and now they’re not allowed to play together.

Clown 2: (starting to lose control again) He can’t play with Matt Chez? I can understand why! My mom always told me not to play with Matches! (laughs out loud)

(a short fire safety message could be inserted here, if you feel so inclined)

Clown 1: You’re making fun of both of their names! Now stop it!

Clown 2: (struggling to gain control of himself) You’re right, I’m sorry… hooh… hah… Okay, I’m better now. So, their mom won’t let them play together? What’s her name?

Clown 1: (innocently) Belle.

Clown 2: (losing control, starting to bend over with laughter, slap himself on the knee, etc.) Belle Chez! Wow, if she belches, maybe she should take Pepto Bismol! (rolling on the floor)

Clown 1: (becoming quite indignant) That’s really enough! And to think that people wanted you to talk about being nice to people, and not making fun of people! Why, if Pete’s dad were here, he’d really be upset with you!

Clown 2: (trying to recover) Hoom… hmm… so, what’s the dad’s name?

Clown 1: (innocently) Rhett!

Clown 2: (now totally losing it) Rhett Chez! If he retches, he must really be sick! Belle needs to share that Pepto Bismol!

Clown 1: (very upset) That’s enough! This whole time, you’ve not been nice at all! You’ve been picking on some very nice people, just because of their names!

Clown 2: Yeah! Peaches, Matches, Belches & Retches! Sounds like a law firm! (laughing at his own cleverness)

Clown 1: Oh yeah? Let me show you what it’s like to be picked on! (scene ends with a chase, possibly ending with the water bucket of confetti routine)

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