Staten Island Ferry - I Love Lucy | clown ministry

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Staten Island Ferry - I Love Lucy episode 139, originally aired January 2, 1956

Staten Island Ferry is a very funny episode of I Love Lucy. In a nutshell, Fred is worried about crossing the ocean to accompany Ricky and his band as the band manager—due to his seasickness. Lucy is not about to let a little thing like seasickness get in the way of her visiting Europe, however. She gets Fred some pills for seasickness, and tries to prove to Fred that they’ll work by going on the Staten Island ferry with him. However, Fred describes his symptoms so vividly that Lucy ‘catches’ his seasickness. She takes the same seasickness pills, but overdoses on them, and the pair fall asleep on the ferry.

When the captain of the ferry awakes them, there is very little time left for them to get to the passport office before it closes. Fred is alright, but Lucy is inebriated from her overdose of seasick pills, allowing her the opportunity to play the inebriate (other example include the famous Vitameatavegamin episode, or the drunk scene in Yours, Mine and Ours). It’s very funny, especially when she has to prove that she’s of sound mind to Charles Lane, who plays the part of ‘petty bureaucrat’ to the hilt. One of the funniest moments is when Fred plugs the wall clock back in (I can’t say more without ruining it—watch the episode for yourself!)

Staten Island Ferry is available as part of the I Love Lucy season 5 DVD collection.

Funny quotes from Staten Island Ferry - I Love Lucy

Fred Mertz (William Frawley): [about getting seasick] Okay okay, but I still wish there was a way to get to Europe by bus.

Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): [on the phone with Marion] Yes, we’re all studying different languages so we can act as guides in different countries. I’m taking French, Fred’s studying German, and Ethel’s learning to speak Italian. Ricky? Oh he’s learning how to speak English. Ha Ha Ha. No, he’s going to take over when we get to Spain.

[Fred says something in German.]
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Great, what does that mean?
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): What do you think it means? Give me a glass of beer.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Is that all he’s learned?
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Nope, he’s learned how to order nine different kinds of beer. Oh, we’re going to have an interesting time in Germany.

Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): How are you coming with your French, honey?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Fine. I have mastered the two most important sentences in the language.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): What are they?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): “How much is that dress in the window?” and “Wrap it up; I’ll take it.”
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Well, I have the feeling Ricky will know the French for “Take it back; it’s too expensive.”

[Lucy and Ethel after they see their passport photos.]
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): I look like Frankenstein.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Well shake hands with your bride.

Fred Mertz (William Frawley): [about Lucy] She’ll be alright. She’s taking a little nap.
Passport OfficeRicky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz) Looks to me like she’s taken a little nip.

Passport OfficeRicky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz) I think this woman is intoxicated. Madam, do you drink?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): I do!

[Ethel needs someone to identify her.]
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): I’ll identify her. I’m her husband.
Passport Officer That’s too bad.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Well you don’t have to rub it in.

Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): It wouldn’t hurt you to stay open a few minutes.
Passport Officer When the five o’clock whistle blows, so do I.

Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Fred, if I miss this trip on account of you, I’ll make you land sick.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): What a horrible choice to have to make!

Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Hey I just had a horrible thought.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): What?
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Maybe we really look like this.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Bite your tongue.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Well what are we going to do now?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Either find another photographer or a plastic surgeon.

Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): I’m going to go and put on a new face.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Just a minute. You’ve had a new face at home all this time and you’re still wearing that one?

Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): [about her picture] Oh it’s terrible. It looks like my face was put on hot and it ran.

Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): I look alright, but my hair looks so funny.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): What’s the matter with it?
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): I look like I have a head of chocolate fudge.

Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): If I thought I really looked like this, I wouldn’t blame Fred if he walked out on me right this minute.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Goodbye.

Fred Mertz (William Frawley): [about his passport photo] I look like a fist with eyes.

Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Here’s two good ones.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): How can you say those are good?
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Because you use these or you’re not going!
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): You know, these are kinda good!