Careers That Slipped Away
Tom Swifty-style jokes about jobs, such as 'I used to work in an orange juice factory, until I got canned. I just couldn't concentrate.'- “I used to work in an orange juice factory, until I got canned. I just couldn’t concentrate.”
- “I used to be a magician’s assistant, but I was dispelled and disillusioned.”
- “I used to be a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the ax.”
- “I used to be a tailor, but I just wasn’t suited for it. Mainly because it was a sew-sew job.”
- “I used to work in a muffler factory until I got exhausted.”
- “I used to be a barber, but I just couldn’t cut it.”
- “I used to be a deli-worker, but any way I sliced it, I just couldn’t cut the mustard.”
- “I used to be a musician, but I wasn’t noteworthy.”
- “I wanted to be a chef because I figured it would add a little spice to my life but I just didn’t have the thyme.”
- “I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn’t have any patients.”
- “I used to be a math teacher, but I had too many problems.”
- “I used to work for a paper company, but they folded.”
- “I used to work for a brake company, but they really went on the skids.”
- “I used to work for a bra manufacturer, but they went bust.”
- I used to be a surgeon, but I was forced to take a big cut in my salary.”
- I used to be a baker, but I was too short of dough.”
- “I used to work for a refrigerator manufacturer, but they had their assets frozen.”
- “I used to be an upholsterer, but I couldn’t cover my costs.”
- “I used to work for an adhesive tape company, but they got into a sticky situation.”
- “I used to work for a tennis ball manufacturer, but they ended up in court.”
- Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn’t fit in.
- I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn’t live on my net income.
- I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
- I managed to get a good job working for a pool-maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
- I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes but I was fired because I wasn’t up to it.
- I got a job in a fitness-center, but they said I wasn’t fit for the job.
- I found being an electrician interesting, but the work was shocking and I was discharged.
- After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.
- My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.
Posted by Tom Raymond, aka Raynbow on 02/22 at 08:59 PM
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